My People

Every now and then, there is some scandal in the news, or some great injustice that ripples across society and generates a variety of reactions. Some people react with rage, others with indignation, some with apathy, still others with sadness. My reaction has been the realization that these people, the …

Notes and Other Notes

I wish I could play music. I wish there was an instrument with which I could vent my pent up emotions. I wish I could give a voice to the little melodies that soundtrack my otherwise often lifeless days. That talent would be priceless to me. But alas, I am …

Drugs

If you are reading this, it means you have managed to survive in this world, and if you are surviving in this world there’s easily a 99% chance that you are using a coping mechanism to do so. For some people this coping mechanism is psychotherapy, for others it is …

Self Help

A brief, informal survey of the internet reveals that, behind pornography, one of the chief exports of cyberspace is self help. Everywhere you look, on thousands of blogs (including occasionally, this one) writers are cranking out words to help readers improve their lives. I suppose this is a symptom of …

Battle of the Brains

The difference between the left hemisphere of our brains and the right hemisphere is well known among the general populace, if poorly understood. Some people it seems are governed by analytical styles of thinking, seeing the world as a science project or math equation. These people are left-brained. Other people, …

To Chaos

The iridescent blue clocklight says its 3:30 am and the sickly orange glow casting shutter slats on the bedroom wall agrees. But for the tick and whir of the fans, and the slow deep breathing of my wife, the room is silent. I get up. I despise waking up at …

Enough

Our behavior, whether we admit it or not, is largely dictated by forces much older and more powerful than our individual choices. The weight of a million histories, of past decisions made by long dead rulers of nations and industry, bears down on every living person. We call this weight …

Worry

I worry. A lot. Primarily in the slack hours right after bedtime. It occurs right after I have finished processing the things that happened that day. My mind, apparently having settled any outstanding business in the past, turns to the future, and the future is fertile ground for worry. I …

Spare Time

It happens to me every weekend: Friday comes and I embrace my freedom. I go out, I see the sights, I wander around the city with new eyes, loving every person and every smoke choked bar because they are signs of the life I don’t get at work during the …

Our Histories

Often, in the moments immediately prior to falling asleep, some idea of another will come rattling down my tired synapses and disturb the otherwise steady progression of sleep in my brain. Usually I will be lazy and let this idea float off with the rationalization that, if the idea was …